テーマ:転職についてのアドバイス

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いつも楽しく見させていただいています。
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本文:
いつも楽しく拝読させていただいております。

転職や人生観などについて相談させていただきたくコメントさせていただきます。
現在、家庭用品の中小メーカーの生産技術者として働く（新卒9年目36歳）トミナガと申します。
入社後1年くらいして生産技術の楽しさに気付き6年目くらいまではサービス残業もいとわず夢中なって働いてました。
ただ、6年目頃に上司ともめたこともあって自社での生産技術職について少しずつ疑問や不満が生まれてきました。
現在はその上司とは部署が変わり、上司との人間関係によるストレスはないです。

昨年12月ごろ、その感情を持ち続けることに嫌気がさし退職を決意し、上司、同僚や後輩に退職宣言しました。
（正直、同僚や後輩達のモチベーションの低さも退職したいと思った原因の一つですが。。。）
ただ、実際今年3月頃より転職活動を始めてみたのですが、"現状維持バイアス"と”罪悪感”と”退職すべきだとは思っているが退職したいわけではない”と気づき
転職活動の意欲も低下してきております。
そもそもニッチ産業の弱輩生産技術者（一応社内的には信頼されている方だとは思います）なためどこかに採用されるもかわからない状況です。
受かっても行きたくなければ辞退すればいいのでまずは応募している段階ですが、恐らく採用されても現職のまま残ることを選択するかと思います。
恥も外聞もないため退職宣言を撤回するのは抵抗ないのですが、このタイミングを逃せばおそらく定年までこの会社で生産技術者として働く可能性は高くなるかと思います。

ここ数ヵ月将来のことばかり考えていて暗い気持ちになります。この状況から逃げて現職のまま生きていくことを考えるとそれもまた暗い気持ちになります。
ちなみに”生産技術者”という立場が今後25年続く可能性が高いということ以外は、給与面や人間関係に関しては自社に不満はないです。
変わりたくて変わろうとするところまではするのですが結局は変われない（だろう）私に何かアドバイスがあればお願いしたいです。
スズキ様のように自分に自信があって転職できて、また独立までできている方を非常にうらやましく思います。
（ちなみに私が現在36歳なのは大学卒業後芸人を夢見て東京の養成所に行ったからです。1年ちょっとであきらめ地元に戻り大学院に
入り直しプロパーで現職に入社しました。10年続けるつもりで東京に行ったはずがすぐに逃げ帰ってきてしまった苦い思い出です。。。）
まとまりのない文章で大変恐縮ですが返信いただけますと幸いです。（san.tomiyo18@gmail.com）

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